Here is the story of how a wardrobe change built my confidence at work. Spoiler: it isn’t what you would expect. In 2015 after the birth of my first daughter, I found myself in a difficult situation, one which many moms will understand – none of my clothes fit. I also didn’t have a lot of money. People had warned me that kids were expensive, but I didn’t fully understand what they meant until I was there. So, with the need for new clothes and the limitations of my budget, I looked for options.
At the time, I had a very stylish coworker who I admired a lot. So I asked her if I was creating a new wardrobe, what were the key pieces she would recommend? She had a shortlist for me, but she also suggested I google capsule wardrobes. Capsule wardrobes are interchangeable base pieces that you can mix and match to create numerous looks for various needs. The specifics of how many pieces should be included in a capsule greatly depend on who you talk to but are often between 15-30 pieces for a seasonal wardrobe. Before having my baby, I had probably 15-30 pairs of pants alone!
This way of dressing is not new nor revolutionary, but it was for me.
I researched, planned, and then purchased my Spring wardrobe pieces. It consisted of various warm-toned items that I would describe as business casual. As I started to wear my tiny new fresh wardrobe, I was sure that everyone would notice me wearing items repeatedly, but shockingly, they didn’t! Nobody commented, and even when I brought it up to coworkers I was close to, they were surprised when I mentioned how few items I had. This all made me begin to question my long-standing assumptions. I realized that nobody was actually paying that close attention to me, at least not in the ways that I had previously imagined they had been. I also realized that confidence doesn’t come from external sources but from inner peace and strength. I got compliments on my new looks, but it wasn’t because of the clothing items. From this newfound freedom, I realized that people aren’t watching you that closely!
I started to see ways to apply this deep understanding to my work. I felt more confident asking questions that I previously thought made me look dumb. I felt more excited to track and share my accomplishments with others because I knew they weren’t otherwise going to notice them. I had mental capacity freed up that allowed me to pay more close attention to the good I saw in others, and I took time to make sure they felt seen while doing their valuable work.
I thought a new wardrobe would make me feel confident because I would feel pulled together and professional. But, in the end, I learned so much more because it taught me lessons about inner confidence and the value of making other people feel seen.
Want to know more about Empowered Development Consulting? Reach out to me, Meghan Schiedel, and find out how Empowered Development Consulting can help you.